SATIRE:IOC strips Usain Bolt of a gold medal; awards it to Imran Tahir instead

The International Olympic Committee has stripped Usain Bolt of the gold medal he won in the 4x100m relay in the 2008 Olympics following his teammate Nesta Carter’s failure in the drug test. In the re-tests of his samples, Carter was found to have consumed the banned stimulant methylhexaneamine.

Instead of promoting the silver medallists to gold, IOC has taken the unprecedented route of awarding the gold medal to Imran Tahir after being impressed by the leg-spinners sprinting skills.

It is learned that IOC had witnessed Tahir’s sprints with his arms up following his wickets and had considered it to be the pertinent replacement for Usain Bolt’s signature celebration.

Tahir picked 6 wickets across the three T20Is vs. Sri Lanka and went out on a celebratory run each time, covering a distance of 150m in approximately 15 seconds which amounts to a speed of 10 m/s which is roughly equal to Bolt’s average speed.

Moreover, Tahir impressed the IOC by overrunning a catch off Seekkuge Prasanna. “Tahir is a great runner. You should not forget the fact that Bolt was a fast bowler before he became a sprinter. So, Tahir is very much suitable for the medal. And, you know, South Africa’s kit is not too different from Jamaica’s. So, it is a like for like replacement,” said an official from IOC.

In the meantime, Puma has shown interests in signing Tahir as their brand ambassador and has said they find Tahir with his headband an alluring figure.

Disclaimer: This article is purely a work of fiction. Readers are expected to take this with a pinch of salt.